What If You’re Terrible at Going Vegan?

When I first decided to go vegan I expected the hardest part would be missing cheese or figuring out where to get protein. What I did not expect was how much it would shake my confidence. Suddenly I went from being the person everyone asked for recipes to the person who could not make a pot of lentils taste good.

Maybe you know that feeling. You decide to make a shift because your heart is leading you there. You know the reasons are solid and the values are clear. But then you sit down to dinner and the food you made tastes bland or downright bad. The kids push their plates away. Your partner suggests ordering pizza. And in that moment you feel not only defeated but embarrassed.

This is the side of going vegan that does not get talked about enough. It is not just about finding substitutes or reading labels. It is about the quiet turmoil inside. The moments when you question yourself and wonder if you are cut out for this. The days when you feel like garbage because nothing tastes the way you hoped.

Today I want to walk with you through that messy middle. Because yes, it feels scary. Yes, it can bruise your ego. And yes, you might be terrible at this in the beginning. But that does not mean you will stay there.

Why Going Vegan Feels So Scary

Let’s start with the truth. Going vegan is not just changing what is on your plate. It is changing how you see yourself. Food is identity. It is the recipes you grew up making with your mom. It is the secret dish you bring to every potluck because people ask for it. It is the holiday cookie tradition you have had since you were a kid.

So when you give up meat, dairy, and eggs you are not just giving up ingredients. You are stepping away from a version of yourself. You are leaving behind familiar comfort. That is why it feels scary. It is not just food. It is memory and family and culture all tied up in one.

And on top of that, you may not have support. Maybe your family thinks you are being extreme. Maybe your friends make little jokes. You can feel like you are standing all alone at the dinner table. The loneliness can hit as hard as the food cravings.

The Ego Hit That No One Mentions

Here is the part that took me down. I used to be a confident cook. I was proud of my ability to put together a meal that looked beautiful and tasted even better. My friends would say, “You should open a restaurant.” I felt like I had that identity nailed down.

Then I went vegan. Suddenly my “signature dishes” were gone. I could not lean on butter or cream or chicken stock. I was back at square one with ingredients I did not understand. Nutritional yeast? Tempeh? Flax eggs? These were not in my regular vocabulary.

So I tried new recipes. And most of them were… not good. Some were edible but forgettable. Some were so bad we ended up throwing them out. Each flop felt like a punch to the gut. I went from confident to clumsy. From admired to apologetic. That is an ego hit no one warns you about.

If you have been there, you know exactly what I mean. It is not just that the food is bad. It is that you feel like you are bad at something you used to be great at. And that hurts.

The Internal Questions That Keep You Up at Night

In those early days my mind was noisy. I kept asking myself things like:

Am I making this too hard?
What if I never get the hang of it?
What if my kids grow up hating family meals because everything tastes weird?
What if I am not strong enough to keep going all by myself?

These questions are not about food. They are about worth. They are about identity. They are about wondering if you have what it takes to live in line with your values when it costs you comfort and approval.

And that, my friend, is heavy.

The Messy Middle

Here is the truth I wish someone had told me. There is a stage between deciding to go vegan and feeling confident about it. That stage is awkward and messy. It is where recipes flop and grocery trips take forever. It is where you feel like you are fumbling around in the dark.

And the thing about the messy middle is that you cannot skip it. You have to move through it. That means there will be nights when dinner does not work. There will be moments when you want to give up. There will be weeks when your confidence is on the floor.

But the messy middle is where the magic happens. Because each little flop teaches you something. Each awkward attempt builds a new skill. And slowly, without realizing it, you move from terrible to capable.

Learning to Be at Peace With Being Terrible

Here is the reframe that changed everything for me. Instead of seeing my failures as proof that I could not do this, I started to see them as evidence that I was learning. I realized I had been here before in other parts of my life.

Think about it. When you learned to drive you were not good right away. When you started a new job you made mistakes. When you became a parent you probably felt clueless. But you figured it out.

Going vegan is the same. You are not supposed to be amazing on day one. You are supposed to stumble. You are supposed to get frustrated. You are supposed to feel like you are not good at it yet. That is the path.

When I accepted that I was allowed to be terrible for a while, something softened. I stopped expecting every meal to be a win. I let myself laugh when something turned out bad. And in that space of grace, I started to get better.

Practical Tips for Getting Through the Hard Part

Now let’s get a little tactical. Because while mindset is huge, there are also some practical ways to make this season easier.

Start with what you know.
Instead of trying brand new complicated vegan recipes, begin with meals you already make and swap one or two ingredients. If you love spaghetti, use lentil pasta and marinara without the meat. If you love tacos, try beans with your favorite toppings. Familiar flavors keep you grounded.

Lower the bar.
Not every dinner needs to be Instagram-worthy. Sometimes success looks like a simple stir fry or a smoothie. Give yourself permission to keep it simple.

Find one or two wins and repeat them.
When you stumble on a recipe that works, make it again. And again. Build a small rotation of go-to meals instead of feeling like you need a whole new cookbook in your head.

Look for support.
Even if your family or friends are not on board, find people who are. Online communities, podcasts, or a local vegan group can make you feel less alone.

Celebrate small wins.
Did your child eat a vegan pancake and ask for more? Celebrate that. Did you make it through a week without ordering takeout? Celebrate that. Small wins add up to momentum.

A Word on Identity

One of the hardest parts of this journey is redefining who you are in the kitchen. If you have always been the person known for a certain dish or for being a confident cook, losing that identity can feel like losing a piece of yourself.

But here is the truth. That part of you is not gone. It is evolving. You are still the creative cook. You are still the person who can make meals that nourish and delight. It just looks different right now.

And think about this. The skills you are learning now will one day be part of your story. Imagine being able to say, “I went from burning tofu to making a vegan lasagna that even my skeptical uncle asked for seconds of.” That is powerful.

The Breakthrough Moment

For me the breakthrough did not come with one perfect meal. It came slowly. One day I realized I was not googling “easy vegan dinners” every night. I had a handful of recipes in my back pocket. I knew which products my kids liked. I could throw together a meal without stressing.

That moment felt like breathing again. I was still learning, of course. But I no longer felt terrible at it. I felt capable. And from there the confidence only grew.

You will have your breakthrough moment too. It might be when your child says, “This is good, Mom.” It might be when you host a dinner and no one even notices the meal is vegan. It might be when you realize you do not miss your old go-to recipes as much as you thought.

That moment is coming. And when it does you will look back and see that the messy middle was worth it.

What If You Really Are Terrible at This?

Let’s circle back to the title question. What if you are terrible at going vegan? The truth is you probably are at first. Most of us are. But that is not the end of the story.

Being terrible does not mean you cannot succeed. It means you are brave enough to try. It means you are willing to let your ego take a hit so your values can shine. It means you are stepping out of comfort into growth.

And that is not something to be ashamed of. That is something to be proud of.

A Final Word of Encouragement

If you are in the thick of it right now, feeling like you cannot get this right, I want you to hear me. You are not alone. You are not failing. You are learning.

Give yourself grace. Laugh at the flops. Celebrate the small wins. And remember that every confident vegan you see online started right where you are. They had their own burnt dinners and awkward moments. The difference is they kept going.

You can keep going too. And one day you will look back and say, “I thought I was terrible at this, but really I was just beginning.”

Ready for More Support?

If you want a little extra encouragement on this journey I created something for you. It is called the Vegan Confidence Kit. Think of it as a gentle guide to help you feel less alone and more supported as you figure this out. Inside you will find simple tips, resources, and a few things I wish I had when I was in the messy middle.

Because you do not have to do this by yourself. You deserve to feel confident and capable. And the truth is you already have what it takes.